Entourage: It's All Too Easy

So another season of Entourage has whizzed by (every year I swear their season ends almost before it begins), but this time I might be ready for a break. The finale left me unsatisfied, and it's frustrating because they were so close to making it work.

When we last left the boys in the penultimate episode, they were flying back to New York because "we always said when we had nothing left, we'd go home." Which rings untrue and is amazingly self-centered for Vince. Everybody else actually was making it in L.A. -- Eric's management company was taking off, Drama was on a hit show, and even Turtle's prospects were looking up thanks to Jamie. Vince was the only one with nothing. I'm all for loyalty to one's friends, but that's a two-way street, and it bugged me to see the gang drop everything they'd worked so hard to build and run home to coddle Vince's ego.

Vince has always been the least interesting character on the show. Things come easy for him, he's lazy and even Ari doubts his acting chops. I thought this was really the chance for Vince to emerge. The meltdown after Gus Van Sant's rejection was the first time I had seen some fire in Vince. How great would it have been for Vince to hit bottom and have to work his way up? Auditioning again, taking supporting roles, basically busting his ass to get back to the top. He always says how passionate he is -- that was the time to show it. Showing his doubts, his struggles, maybe his jealousy over his friends' success might have actually given Vince some depth, and would have made him 1,000 times more interesting than he is now.

But along comes Marty Scorcese out of nowhere to hand-deliver what could be the biggest plum in Vince's career. And yeah, he'd be perfect as the modern Gatsby. But for once, I wanted to see him earn something. Everyone else has, and they've become better people and better characters. Vince is still getting life handed to him on a platter and hasn't grown a bit since Season 1. And that routine just gets old.
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TV Death Watch

Pushing Daisies is all but dead, and don't look for Ned to revive it. ABC announced Thursday that the show, along with Dirty Sexy Money and Eli Stone, won't be shooting any more episodes. While short of an official cancellation, it's unlikely any will return once they're done airing the shows that have already been shot. Life on Mars, meanwhile, got picked up for more shows and will follow Lost on Wednesdays starting Jan. 28, after a monthlong hiatus starting in December. And ABC also announced the return(?) of Scrubs to its new network on Jan. 6.

Too bad about Pushing Daisies, but the writers strike last year really killed it just as it was gaining momentum. And the second season just never recaptured the quirky, goofy, original feel. Instead it began to feel schmaltzy and repetitive. Word on the street is that the final episode to air was written to serve as a series finale, so loyal viewers might get some sense of closure. That'll air on Dec. 10 (I think).

I've cooled a bit on Life on Mars. If I'm home and bored, I'll watch it, but I have a couple episodes sitting unwatched on my DVR. It's slower-moving in terms of the overall plot arc than the BBC original, and much less compelling. But it'll be a good match with Lost, especially if they start focusing on the mystery behind Sam's time travel.
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The Shield: Who's Going Down?

The Shield series finale is next week, and word on the street is that the most frenetic, intense, hardcore cop show ever made is going out in a blaze of glory. Entertainment Weekly reports that four major characters will die. So who will it be? Here's a quickie handicap of the field:

Councilman David Aceveda (10-1): At one time, I was confident Aceveda would end up dead. But now I'm not so sure. It almost seems better for him to succeed and become mayor, keeping the cycle of cynicism and corruption going. Of course, he's right in the middle of the cartel sting, and he could get caught in the crossfire while trying to prove himself to ICE. But Aceveda always manages to slip through sticky situations, and I see him getting away safely.

Det. Steve Billings (5-1): How ironic would it be for Billings to go down in the line of duty and receive a hero's sendoff? It seems his primary concern (other than beating the system) is providing for his ex-wife and daughter, and the widow's benefits would do that. Hmmm, the more I think about it, the more I'm thinking he's a dark horse candidate for the morgue.

Det. Ronnie Gardocki (3-1): Ronnie needs to run. Now. The cops have him for being Vic's bagman, and the feds have him on Vic's confession. He has zero options. I could see him whacking Shane, maybe even Mara, and then taking his own life. He might be smart enough to escape to Mexico or work a deal to rat on Vic, if there's anything left he could be tried for. But Ronnie's future isn't looking good.

Off. Tina Hanlon (20-1): She could have been killed off a few times before, and she doesn't seem particularly capable when all hell's breaking loose. But I don't think it'll be her, just because her character's been too minor and her death wouldn't resonate as much.

Det. Julian Lowe (15-1): Julian's story has fallen to the wayside over the years, but he's the moral compass of the show. Which is why I could see him falling victim in the battle against the baddies. What more poetic than the death of the one good cop? Still, I don't think the show will end entirely cynically, and I think he'll make it.

Cassidy Mackey (10-1): Vic's daughter has been in various stages of teenage meltdown all season. I could see her attempting suicide as a cry for help, only she turns out to do it right.

Corrine Mackey (50-1): No one's safe, but I think Vic's ex-wife is as safe as can be. Vic won't hurt her, and unless there's some sort of tragic accident, I think she'll emerge unscathed. Well, physically, at least.

Vic Mackey (2-1): The ending is Shakespearean for the baddest cop on the block. He's finally come clean on everything he's done and has federal blanket immunity. But he can't just walk away. Vic has sinned, and he has to pay somehow. Who'd kill him? The list of enemies is long, but I don't think Vic will go down a chump. He would have to be killed by a worthy foe -- not some cartel hitman or a random cop. It would have to be someone close, someone to complete the circle of tragedy. Ex-wife Corrine, in fear of her life? Or unstable daughter Cassidy? I could see either one popping a cap in Vic's skull in self-defense. I don't see Vic going the suicide route, but that's a slight possibility too. I'm also holding out for a small chance that Vic gets away, but loses everything he holds dear -- his family, his reputation, his future.

Off. Danni Sofer (30-1): I don't see her going down either. In fact, I see her as more of a threat to kill Vic, like Corrine, in some sort of self-defense scenario. And she's a single mom. Leaving a trail of orphans is no way to end a show. (Except for you Jackson, sorry kid.)

Mara Vendrell (3-1): Her odds increased in the last episode, when she gunned down an innocent woman. Mara was never innocent, but now she has blood on her hands. She's as desperate as Shane is, and might see suicide as the only way out. The tricky question here is her unborn baby and son Jackson. Vic's already said Jackson's too young to be a credible witness, so he's safe. But who'd take out a pregnant woman? A desperate Ronnie?

Shane Vendrell (even): Shane has to die. He killed Lem, his best friend, and so many bodies have dropped as a consequence of that. He has to go down. But by whose hand? Vic would risk his immunity by killing him now. But Ronnie would do it in a heartbeat. I don't see a random cop or gangbanger out for a bounty getting it done. For all the wrongs Shane has done, it has to be someone close to him. Maybe even himself -- Shane's becoming unwound, no place to run, no future for him or his family, and now he's hopped up on drugs. I can easily see a murder-suicide with him and Mara.

Det. "Dutch" Wagenbach (3-1): I'm getting scared for Dutchboy. He'd be at the center of any cartel/Ronnie takedown, but I think the bigger threat is the budding serial killer kid who's apparently calling him. Dutch has always had a thing for serial killers, and maybe now he's got one who's smarter than him, and who's looking to eliminate a threat. Watch your back, Dutch.

Capt. Claudette Wyms (4-1): Her health has been faltering all season. After her meltdown at the federal building, will she stroke herself out? Or can she live in a world where good cops fail and bad cops escape justice? I don't like her going the sleeping-pills route, but it's possible. I see more of a Frank Pembleton-like health breakdown.

So place your bets. My money's on Billings, Shane, Mara and Ronnie.
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Mmmmmm, Top Chef

Know how to properly make chicken piccata, and never undercook beets. That's what I've learned from watching Top Chef. And kids, those are lessons for life.

Season 5 of TV's best competition reality show kicks off tonight (10 p.m., Bravo), and this time the setting's Brooklyn (so expect it to rate high on the hipster-meter). Now I don't pretend to be a great cook, or even a good one. But damn, I love this show. It's so well done, the competitors so talented, the contests so relevant. Possibly unique among shows of its ilk, Top Chef actually pits highly accomplished people and lets them do what they do best -- cook. So simple, but in a TV world that rewards adults for being smarter than a fifth grader, it's refreshing to see a show that rewards actual excellence.

It's also opened my eyes to new food. Would I have tried sweetbreads or foie gras before seeing the judges drooling over them on Top Chef? Well, maybe. But it certainly made me more open to different foods and flavors. Although the thought of Stephanie's peanut butter couscous from last season still makes me gag.

Chef-testants this season include sheltered suburban mom Ariane, overbearing Long Islander Danny, Stefan the frightening Finn and an Italian actually named Fabio. Of local interest, executive chef Jamie Lauren of San Francisco's Absinthe is in the mix. Here's hoping she fares better than last season's sorry collection of San Francisco chefs. Returning to judges' table are carnivorous head judge Tom Colicchio and his penetrating glare, ice queen host Padme Lakshmi and her mile-long legs, the lovely and delightful Gail Simmons (Sorry Anne, but is it wrong to have a crush on her?) and new judge Toby Young, who replaces Ted Allen, who for some reason ($) left a brilliant show for the utterly lame Food Detectives on Discovery. No word on whether Anthony Bourdain will make another memorable guest judge appearance, but Eric Ripert, Wiley Dufrense, Martha Stewart, Rocco Despirito and Dave Grohl (?!?) are on tap.
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The Shield: This Can't End Well

I really want Vic Mackey to get away with it all. Despite all the bad stuff he's done on The Shield -- and there's a lot of it -- he's still the guy you're rooting for, the only one tough enough to get his hands dirty and do what's necessary, whether it's for the good of him, his family, or his city. There's something slightly noble in how he won't skip town before he takes down the Mexican cartel. Sure, it's a whole lot of self-preservation at work too, but with Vic being Vic, you know he could run now and live a life of leisure on some Mexican beach. But Vic's not a quitter, and he's in it till the end for better or worse. And of course, it'll be for worse.

Vic's the ultimate player -- the riverboat gambler who can read the situation and quickly adapt it to his advantage, raising the stakes higher and higher and somehow always winning. He's covered his back pretty well in his illegalities -- from murdering fellow cop Terry Crowley to robbing the Armenian money train, to countless other set-ups, frame jobs and abuses. There are precious few loose ends. But even those are now starting to unravel. Shane's on the run with his wife and sick kid, along with his file that could send Vic to prison for life. Vic's cornered, starting to panic, abandoning his code -- he's always had a soft spot for women and children, even the ones who've burned him. But now he's willing to kill Shane's wife, Mara, and her unborn child to save himself. That's a pretty big line to cross.

You get the feeling Vic's taken one step too far, and has fallen off the ledge and can't go back. Now his ex-wife, Corinne, is spilling her secrets to the cops. Vic's trapped on all sides, and I don't see a viable way out. He can run, now. Or he can stay and fight, and inevitably lose.

There are only four episodes left of this brilliant series, and however many twists and turns are left, and whichever direction Vic turns, you just know it won't end well for him. Judgement day is almost upon us, and Vic Mackey is going to go down guns blazing.
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Something to look forward to

The fall TV season stinks. But there is something to look forward to: a new crop of shows in January. Here's a quick look at what's coming in 2009:

• Monk and Psych: short winter seasons starts Jan. 9 on USA.
• 24: Jan. 11 on Fox.
• Battlestar Galactica: Jan. 16 on Sci-Fi.
  
• Big Love and Flight of the Conchords: Jan. 18 on HBO.
• Lost: Jan. 21 on ABC.
• Burn Notice: short winter season begins Jan. 22 on USA.
  
• Nip/Tuck and Damages: return in January to FX. (Rescue Me won't return until March or April)
• Breaking Bad: first quarter of 2009; no date has been set by AMC.
• Reaper: early 2009 (no date has been set by the CW)

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Dollhouse? Um, nevermind

Sounds like you can forget about Joss Whedon's upcoming sci-fi show Dollhouse. The show that once had a ton of buzz has been slotted to the TV wasteland of 9 p.m. Fridays, starting Feb. 13. In other words, Fox already paid for a bunch of episodes, but they hate the show and just want to burn it off when no one's watching.

Ehh, maybe that's OK. A new trailer for the show hit the web today, and it looks kinda lame.


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Bye bye, Heroes

How far has Heroes fallen? It's being bumped tonight in favor of the consistently awful Saturday Night Live's "Presidential Bash" (I'm going to go out on a limb and predict they'll use the opportunity to showcase Tina Fey one last time). It's just as well -- the acting in Heroes would probably generate more comedy, though unintentional. I won't miss it -- I'm done with Heroes. As I've mentioned before, it's gotten too complicated and too stupid. And as Tim Goodman mentioned in a recent podcast, it hasn't even followed its own Bible of characters' powers and personalities. I give up.

In a related note, the show's two top writers were fired today. Co-executive producers Jeph Loeb and Jesse Alexander ran the show on a day-to-day basis, and “It’s understood that Alexander and Loeb were let go because of Peacock execs’ frustration with the creative direction of the show,” according to Monday's story in Variety.

Can't say that the firings weren't deserved. What was once one of the more creative, intriguing shows on TV has gone horribly, horribly awry. So my fanship is officially dead. And unlike a Petrelli family member, I won't be back.

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